UGH

I was feeling so good about my weight loss yesterday and decided to have a full blown cheat day. I ended up eating General Tso's Chicken with white rice...OH YUMMMM But then I felt sooooo sick all day! I still managed to do some free weights and toning exercise!

So I woke up this morning feeling really out of sorts, course it did not help that the reason I woke up was the twins yelling at each other, man that pissed me off! But then I got thinking about a phone call I received yesterday. My best friend for over 30 years called me. I could tell something was not quite right. A little background She has neurofibromatosis, more commonly known as Elephant man's disease. Her mother had it, she has it and one of her daughters has it. Her tumors or lumps are not too bad, but on occasion she gets a lump here and there, no big deal. Her Mom had the little lumps all over, her daughter, age 25, has inoperable tumors in her brain...but she is living a fairly normal life and the docs never expected her to live this long..but she is a fighter and will live a very long life! OK back to the main subject, my best friend, Amy. She had a mammogram yesterday and it took a lot longer than normal, they ended up having to call the doc to look at it on the spot...needless to say, she has to have a biopsy next week. The Minute she told me my mind started wondering, I could not focus on anything else. She is extremely positive, which helped me get back into focus, but still, to think that my best friend could have....well you know...It is frightening. She is like a sister to me! Which by the way is funny, since a few years ago, my sister had the same scare. (My Sister btw, is a cancer survivor, she had thyroid cancer. All I could wonder at the time was "If she had cancer once does this increase her chances of having other kinds of cancer"? But luckily she was free and clear and remains that way to this day!} So back to Amy...we have known each other, forever it seems! We have been thru so much together, hell our oldest kids are only weeks apart! I am trying hard to only think positive thoughts, but there are times when I just want to sit and cry! Is it better to hold it in or to let it out?! I am not sure....either one could send me into a relapse (which happened during my sister;s scare) UUUGGGGH!!

So at least I got it off my chest...maybe this will help me to keep thinking and sending positive thoughts her way!